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Twist & Shout

As Americans, we are well-versed in living in a society that wants us to buy stuff. Everywhere we turn we are hit with advertising, logos, suggestive photos, and even smells (talking about you, shopping mall Cinnabon!). Because we know that these companies are trying to get us to part with our hard-earned money, we’ve developed defense techniques. For instance, don’t ever, ever make eye-contact with the guy in the mall kiosk selling Israeli Dead Sea Salts.

On the other hand, we don’t really expect to have to develop similar defense techniques for those organizations that want to help us. Right? Let’s take the news media. Why would they lie to us? Why would they have some sort of agenda to modify our behavior? Or how about any government agency, they work for us, right? Shouldn’t we believe what the experts at the CDC or the Public Health Department tell us? Then there is the government education system. They love our kids, right? Surely they want our kids to learn and become successful, thinking adults. And by extension, the teacher’s union wants what is best for our children. Sure they do.

There is no difference between Hustler and what parents want out of Sheridan school libraries.

Then why is it that everyone, including the news media, government agencies, and education systems, twist wording to imply something else? The people who don’t believe young children should be exposed to pornography in school libraries are labelled as “wanting to BAN books.” Here’s the unvarnished truth: they don’t want to ban books, they only want inappropriate books unavailable to their children in school libraries. You folks claiming this is a “First Amendment issue” would think differently if copies of Hustler magazine were in the elementary school libraries. Newsflash: there is no difference between Hustler and what parents want out of Sheridan school libraries.

Now we have the Wyoming Department of Health running expensive, full-page ads in our newspapers supporting vaccinations. This would be the same overfunded department that pushed us to get a “safe & effective” CCP virus vaccine that was neither safe nor effective. They were also telling us masks really worked too, just after the “two weeks to flatten the curve” of mandated shut-downs.

The news media goes along with all of this nonsense, gladly trashing anyone who disagrees, with adjectives designed to modify your feelings. If you didn’t support the vaccine, you were labeled an “anti-vaxxer.” If you didn’t wear the ineffective face diaper, you were labeled a “science denier.” If you wanted to try Ivermectin, you were accused of taking “horse dewormer” because you were an anti-vax, science denier who didn’t believe the science experts. Never mind that the guys who invented Ivermectin received a Nobel Prize nor that it is a common drug for treating skin problems, among a myriad of other uses. You basically were a Neanderthal if you didn’t acquiesce to the government. Bow and curtsy, you peons!

Most of us are familiar with the word from the “Communist Manifesto” or from the screeds left behind by psychotic mass murderers.

There was a little letter to the editor in the Sheridan Press on April 25 by a correspondent calling himself Ray Olson. Mr. Olson is a master of the “twist.” Right off the bat, he asks if anyone has read the “manifesto” from the Sheridan County GOP. Interesting choice of wording, Ray. Most of us are familiar with the word from the “Communist Manifesto” or from the screeds left behind by psychotic mass murderers. Do you see what Ray did there? While on the subject, just what happened to the manifesto from the gender-confused murderer of children at the Christian School in Nashville? Bet that didn’t fit the narrative and has been buried forever. We realize that we aren’t as smart as Ray Olson, but it took us more than a few minutes to figure out just what in the glorious ether he was talking about. Ray, it’s called a Resolution, not a Manifesto.

Resolutions are wonderfully useless statements that political groups love to put out and are basically meaningless. If you don’t believe this, a few years back the Wyoming Republican Party wasted an hour of time, discussing and eventually passing a resolution on highway rumble strips. Rumble strips. The author was annoyed that he couldn’t drive down any highway without his farm equipment making noise on the rumble strips and wanted them either banned or moved so far off to the side as to be ineffective. We must have missed Ray Olson’s letter to the editor about that particular manifesto.

Modern, educational science trumps ten-thousand years of mankind.

Getting back to Ol’ Ray, he apparently is of the belief that the government school system knows more about raising children than parents. Modern, educational science trumps ten-thousand years of mankind. However did we survive before the government was there to save us? He claims that the Resolution passed by the Sheridan County GOP (and, we will add, by many other counties and likely the state party too), will make it impossible for a teacher to acknowledge that little Johnny has two dads as a family unit. Well, biologically, little Johnny can’t exist without a dad and a mom, but let’s not complicate matters with science. Mr. Olson also claims that if this manifesto was a law, teachers could no longer protect little Johnny when his two dads have a spat and beat him for trying to wear a fuchsia shirt with red socks or some similar sort of fashion faux pas. Only the government can protect children from their parents, don’t you know! The strange thing is, some parents feel that they should be in charge of raising their children, not the government school system. Weird, right? Especially since the government is just, oh so trustworthy and wouldn’t lie to us about vaccines and most definitely wouldn’t transition our child to the opposite sex without telling us or asking approval. The Water is Sweet, just trust the experts!

Which brings us to our next outstanding individual of the week, Beth Howard. You may have missed the article headline shouted from the pages of the Sheridan Press on April 24: “Despite surge in gun violence nationwide, Wyomingites remain divided on solutions.” Poor Beth Howard is a hoplophobe. You know those people who read about an Ebola outbreak in Chad then sequester themselves in their homes eight-thousand miles away, surrounded by hand sanitizer and Fauci-approved masks? Beth is that person with firearms. Why she lives in Wyoming, we don’t know. You’d think she’d move to someplace without guns, like, say, Chicago or New York City. But we have to admire Beth because, even though she fears for her life around all those violent guns, she is still with us in Wyoming and is doing her best, with Michael Bloomberg’s financial help, to end “gun violence.”

Guns aren’t violent, People are.

We are obviously not as smart as Beth Howard because we can’t, even with a quadratic equation, figure out how an inanimate object can be violent. Anyone? Bueller? Yet the media incessantly shouts about “gun violence” as if that is really a thing. Here’s a tip from those of us who aren’t as educated: Guns aren’t violent, People are. If guns truly were violent, as the media and Ms. Howard would like us to believe, the population of Wyoming would have been wiped out leaving nothing but some coyotes, magpies, and a handful of non-gunowning lefties behind. Well, maybe the Press is omniscient and that “surge in gun violence” is going to get us in Wyoming after all. You may regret stocking up on 5.56 ammo. Nah.

But, don’t worry, there are solutions! Um, right. The article had the usual laundry list of additional infringements on our rights, none of which would make any difference other than to make the lives of law-abiding gun owners even more difficult than they already are. We don’t like their solutions. We really like our solutions instead: repeal the NFA, repeal the 1968 GCA, eliminate all background checks, allow anyone to purchase and possess any firearm, anywhere, at any time. Sort of makes you nostalgic for the early 1960s or the 1920s, doesn’t it? How did we all survive the “gun violence” before any of those great “common sense” gun laws? Can you actually believe that none of those rifles in the back windows of unlocked ranch trucks didn’t shoot up a Wyoming high school? Whoa, that’s far out. Maybe older guns aren’t as violent or something.

Looking back, we’ve rambled around a bit. To summarize this peripatetic post, we recommend you don’t trust anything published by any government or media outlet. And we mean all governments and all media outlets. Some folks, likely those named in this article, love to disparage people who get their news from Fox News or InfoWars, while bragging they only read the New York Times and watch PBS. If you have a brain, and we know you do because you’ve read this far, you’ve figured out that NONE OF THEM tell you the whole story (or even any of the story, ahem, Ukraine), and they all twist their reporting to fit their narrative. Every single one of them. About the best you can do is either live in a cave (highly recommended, especially with summer heat on the way), or get your information from a variety of sources and see what passes the smell test (hard to do when living in a stinky cave).

Or you can just wait for us to make fun of it here.

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